Carnaval! {shakes bunda}

And lo - the party season is upon us once more.

With 16% more party than last year, apparently. (An additional number of permits have been authorised for the blocos (street parties) this year) Thank fuck for that too, because I was a little concerned at the frugality of last year's 400-odd blocos).

And this year we'll have four sexy guests occupying nossa casa - Helid & Chrinda. Woohoo! All very exciting, but I only hope it stops bloody raining before they get here. Oh well, even if it rains it'll still be a tad warmer round these parts, and the wetter we get the more chance of a nipple showing through, so it'll be grand so.

These past few weeks we're mostly getting our shit together for the party - getting the apartment together, sorting out tickets, planning touristy things, all that jazz. I think everything's pretty much sorted now though, so from Friday we shall be mostly eating and drinking to a dangerous level of excess. Sweeee eeeee

ee eeet.

Last year's Carnaval was brilliant, but this year we're a little more organised. I kinda know my arse from my elbow this time around, since I'd only been living here a couple of months before the 2012 shindig. We're going to the official parade at the Sambodromo on the Sunday night, so (if it's not pissing down) I'm looking forward to that. And we'll hopefully plan the blocos a little better this year, to try and get to some of the cool themed ones. It may mean getting up with a hangover at 9am, but it's gotta be done.

In other news, I'll have a load of new private students starting classes with me in March, so I'll have a full timetable, and a decent wage, finally. Everything's still going really well on that front, and I'm looking forward to getting started after the holidays.

And that's about it really. Hoping to get home for a visit in May, so keep your diaries open for a pint, and there's a possibility of a festival around that time too - I'm thinking the Primavera Porto one is probably the best option at the minute, so if any of yous are interested keep an eye opened for the lineup annoucement next Tuesday, If it's anything like the Barcelona one it'll be brillpops.

A'ight? 

More listage! Happy new year!

This year we watched a serious stack of films and television, so it would be remiss not to compose another list for your curious eyes. Again, like the music list from a few weeks ago, it's an entirely subjective list of my favourite fillums and TV from the year.

Before any pedantic nerds get uppity about release dates or anything like that ("Hey that was out in 2011 you buttfox!"), I say this: "Suck my buttfox".

Top Ten Favourite Films of 2012 by Jarf for you to read now

1) Amour
2) Moonrise Kingdom
3) Take Shelter
4) Once Upon a Time in Anatolia
5) Martha Marcy May Marlene
6) Pirates! In an adventure with scientists
7) Monsieur Lazhar
8) Headhunters
9) Weekend
10) Looper

There were loads of others that we watched last year that were released on DVD in 2012 so they didn't make it (the Oscar ones - The Descendants, The Artist, etc). Maybe they should have been eligible, I dunno. I'm confused.

I enjoyed the big blockbusters of the year too (Avengers, Dark Knight, Prometheus, Skyfall), but they were all just too silly to make it into the lists. Entertaining, but ultimately lacking in EMOTIONAL DEPTH. I included Looper because the plot was just more interesting than the others.

Elite Squad II was released on DVD this year too - definitely worth watching to see how scary the BOPE police force are around these parts. The other day I got a bus with two officers casually sitting at the back, just holding their guns on their laps. They really are just Terminators.

On reflection, there's loads of others that didn't make it either, but I'd still recommend - Best Exotic Marigold Hotel, The Skin I Live In, Holy Motors, and I'm sure there's others too. Like I said, we watched STACKS this year.

So, on to the Top Ten Televisual Treats.

1) Hunderby (Series 1)
2) Homeland (Season 1!)
3) Boardwalk Empire (Season 3)
4) Louie (Season 3)
5)The Bridge (Season 1)
6) Walking Dead (Season 3)
7) The Killing (Season 3)
8) Nurse Jackie (Season 3)
9) Modern Family (Season 4)
10) Parks & Recreation (Season 5)

Our favourite discovery of the year was definitely Adventure Time though. It's the funniest, most creative and inventive thing I've seen for years. Hugo picked Downton Abbey as his number one choice this year - I didn't watch it, although from what I've seen in the background NOTHING HAPPENS IN IT? Nothing needs to happen for it to be good though, I suppose.

And so, on to the final, most important list of the year....

Top 3 Apples of 2012

It's been a strong year for apples, and it was going to have to be after last year's resounding victory for the Pink Lady. I'm focusing on shop-bought apples here, so connoisseurs may cock a snook but to them I say "good day!".

1) Fuji
2) Argentina
3) Red Delicious

But who are we kidding? This was the year of the pineapple, the mango, the banana, and the grapefruit!

Here's to 2013
x (with tongue)

Music List 2012 ! Lists Lists Lists!

You need more lists, right? It’s the one thing that’s really lacking at the end of the year, isn’t it? Without lists we’d all be screwed. I mean, how else would we remember to gather our leaves and twigs, or tidy under our beds, unless these were carefully recorded on a list of things to do? THEY’D SIMPLY NEVER GET DONE. NEVER EVER!

Alrighty then, this year I’ve definitely been getting my groove on over here in Brasil with lots of new musics, albeit disappointingly lacking in South American material. A new year’s resolution should really be to find out some local stuff to get my teeth into.

I’ve compiled a list of my 20 favourite albums of the year. I could’ve incuded many more, and there are still loads and loads that I wanted to listen to but haven’t had a chance just yet, as obviously it’s impossible to cover everything (unless you’re Steve Roberts of course).

One of the main things I noticed this year was how many strong female-led albums there were. From Jessie Ware to Cat Power and that one from Beach House, stacks of the albums I listened to had really strong girlywirly vocals. I think 6 or 7 out of my top 20 had female singers. Aww.

There was also a great deal of nostalgia in my favourites too – from Dinosaur Jr sounding, well, just like they always do, and Neil Young still pulling some great tunes out of his Crazy Horse, it sounded just like my 90s again. Throw in Beta Band copyists Django Django, the obvious electronecessities (John Talabot/Ulrich/Hot Chip), some psychenonsense (Goat), and good old acoustic guitars (First Aid Kit/Woods) and you’ve got yourself a winner.

There were a great deal of bands that I love that didn’t make my cut this time round –Tindersticks, Lambchop, Mark Lanegan, Dirty Three, Walkmen, Tallest Man, The Shins, Sun Kil Moon, Sigur Ros, Gravenhurst, M Ward, etc, etc, etc . All these albums were good, but I didn’t find myself wanting to hear them again and again and again, and again and again, unlike some of their earlier albums. Maybe they’ll grow on me a bit more.

There were several I wanted to hear but haven’t heard yet too – Godspeed!, Neil Halstead, Lee Ranaldo, and many more, so maybe these guys would have made it onto the list too. Who the hell knows, eh?

Anyway, I’m rambling like a crazy old peach, so I’ll get on with it. Lemme know what you thinksy.

1) Django Django – Django Django
2) Sharon Van Etten – Tramp
3) First Aid Kit – The Lion’s Roar
4) Swans – The Seer
5) Woods – Bend Beyond
6) Chilly Gonzales – Solo Piano II
7) Guided by Voices – Class Clown Spots a UFO
8) School of Seven Bells - Ghostory
9) Goat – World Music
10) Spiritualized – Sweet Heart Sweet Light
11) Hot Chip – In Our Heads
12) Efterklang – Piramida
13) John Talabot – Fin
14) Neil Young & Crazy Horse – Psychedelic Pill
15) Smoke Fairies – Blood Speaks
16) Ulrich Schnauss & Mark Peters – Underrated Silence
17) Dinosaur Jr – I Bet on Sky
18) Ariel Pink’s Haunted Graffiti – Mature Themes
19) Young Magic – Melt
20) Jessie Ware - Devotion

I’ll post again with a list of my favourite fillums and TV shows for the year too, since myself and Hugo have managed to watch an incredible 110 films this year so far, mostly down to regular lazybastard Sundays with 3 or 4 fillums in a row. Nice.

Also, for other, better informed lists and music links and stuff, check out these guys:

http://sanyo815.blogspot.co.uk/2012/12/the-ultimate-best-tunes-of-2012-by-dj.html

http://www.last.fm/user/old_man_bourner

http://www.last.fm/user/drdinnermint

http://www.last.fm/user/dansroberts

http://www.mixcloud.com/djdavidtabalipa/  (Some great Brasilian musics here)

Oh, and finally – Frank Ocean didn’t make it above, most probably because I have no soul.

November Rain

Ahoy hoy m'laddios & m'laddias.

So, what news of November? Well, it's been a busy month by my hazy lazy like, kind of crazy like, South American way, with extra lashings of beef, motorbike shootouts, birthdays, anniversaries, melted mozzarella balls, and telling lies to small children. Totally bumper!

I'll start with Death Bus 2012 - it's the same crazybus I've complained about before, the windy mountain mental crashmagnet. We were coming back in the early evening last week and we suddenly heard gunfire breaking out as we crossed a busy intersection. It didn't really sound like I expected gunfire to sound, it was more like the noise you'd get from a toy capgun. But there was a motionless body in the street and lots of others lying on the pavements for cover which suggested it wasn't as pathetic a weapon as it'd sounded. Before we all ducked for cover and told the driver to leg it I saw someone on a motorbike being hauled off by two cops. I guess he won't have had a pleasant evening last Thursday, in jailz. There was nothing about it on the news, but that was maybe because there was another shooting that evening in a different dodgy part of the city, with two fatalities. Maybe two's the minimum for coverage? Anyway, I'm pretty sure it was a one-off. The area round there used to be fairly dangerous but it's much safer now, and there's plenty of hotcops around to look menacing.

For Hugo's birthday we went to a couple of all you eat before you die in a shootout restaurants, which was most excellent. The first was a churrascaria overlooking Guanabara Bay in Botafogo, with a nice view of the beachfront and the bay. The amount of meat is ridiculously brilliant, and the staff are constantly bringing fresh things for you to gorge on. Highlights included the picanha (as always), and the introduction of tasty hot mozzarella balls about halfway through the meal. Nice arrive, cheese.

The next day we went to an all you can eat lunch buffet, which was also pretty darn good. You can pretty much have anything you want - meats, salads, italian stuff, japanese, brasilian dishes, and other stuff. Suffice to say I was feeling like a fat bastard the next day. Fantastic!

It's also been just over a year now since I've moved here, so a couple of celebratory cocktails were imbibed. It's strange to think that it's been a full year - I'm noticing the rather odd juxtaposition of Santa Claus, Christmas trees, bikinis and sunshine again.

And to top off an exciting month, we now have four confirmed guests for the carnaval shenanigans! I've started to look forward to it a lot now; I can't wait to see Helid, Linda and Chris again, and I suspect it's going to be one to remember. I'm glad I know my way around a lot more now, considering the last time I'd only really been here for 2 or 3 months, and didn't know my arse from my elbow.

And that is that, for now.

Oh, some young kids were asking me excited questions at football last week, and when I said I'd lived in Manchester, they asked me (I think - a lot was lost in translation) if I had played for United, and whether I knew Cristiano Ronaldo. My double affirmative caused their jaws to drop, which was kinda funny, even if lies do make baby Jesus cry.

Paraty photos